Episode 208
Episode 208 - You Need A Coach Too!
We're always busy helping everyone else, but how often do we stop and ask for some help with our challenges? NOT ENOUGH is the answer! Bob and Josh talk through why this is important, yet challenging, along with providing a playbook of how you can find the right people to help you. What's your approach to getting help? Let's discuss!
Key Links From The Episode:
- Webinar Registration: The Journeys of 7 Black Scrum Alliance Coaches
- Remember, we're trying to flood this webinar with Meta-Cast listeners!! We'll see you there!
- LinkedIn profiles of the two women Bob and Josh mentioned in the podcast that had the courage & gumption to reach out to us for some help. Yep, they are both crushing it!!!
- Dimple Shah
- Lena Popretinskaya
Keep The Conversation Going:
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Transcript
The fans demand the fans that we we've been right.
Speaker:I've gotten death threats.
Speaker:I think just.
Speaker:Can we hear
Speaker:he broke himself.
Speaker:I got a bit of
Speaker:bad news.
Speaker:Let's go.
Speaker:Let's go.
Speaker:Bob, have you ever asked for help, like as a leader in the company, when you
Speaker:were VP of who knows it, what's it, did you ever say, you know what tack on it?
Speaker:I don't know what the heck to do.
Speaker:I need help.
Speaker:You know, I can say this with all new, honestly, Josh.
Speaker:I mean, I really know it all and I'm not, you know, I'm humble, but that's
Speaker:why people show up to the podcast.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:No, uh, I have, I have but it's hard.
Speaker:I think, for me and for people I've gotten more comfortable with.
Speaker:I so I'll come at it.
Speaker:I'll come at it from a different way.
Speaker:I don't know how many, I think you've heard this before.
Speaker:I've written a blog post about this, should imagine that about people waiting
Speaker:in my, in my coaching by the time people reach out to me, it's not funny.
Speaker:I often think probably 80% of the time when I get a request for coaching.
Speaker:It's I, my, my thought is with, with respect, I try to, I try to be, keep
Speaker:my brain respectful and not judgmental that, why did you wait so long?
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:Yeah, I understand.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:I'm like, I'm like, why didn't you call?
Speaker:And it's not even just call me, it's call someone.
Speaker:Why didn't you, you know, you waited so late that, I mean, it's not,
Speaker:there's never, it's never too late, but you waited so late and went
Speaker:through so much crap and so much pain.
Speaker:Why didn't you call?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So I th I, so I think I've gotten much more comfortable with that.
Speaker:I think early in my career, you know, it wasn't, it was not discomfort.
Speaker:It was what was.
Speaker:I just didn't think maybe it, maybe I wasn't self-aware maybe I thought I knew
Speaker:everything I wasn't cocky, so I don't think I've ever been cocky that way, but I
Speaker:didn't, it didn't cross my mind that, you know, help with something was an option.
Speaker:For a variety of reasons, maybe safety, et cetera, my roles and companies and stuff.
Speaker:But I didn't, I didn't even think about it.
Speaker:But then there came a period of time where I transitioned and
Speaker:I re I grew, I guess I matured.
Speaker:And I grew up and I realized that it was, you know, there's nothing
Speaker:wrong with saying, I don't know.
Speaker:There's nothing like.
Speaker:With asking for help.
Speaker:It's actually a very positive thing.
Speaker:So how about you?
Speaker:And we can get into some space.
Speaker:Yeah, I would say not as much as I could or should have a
Speaker:couple of factors play into that.
Speaker:I, as I think about it, that I think really drove that
Speaker:behavior and still affect me.
Speaker:If you've listened to enough episodes, you've heard me
Speaker:talk about the anti mentors.
Speaker:And most of my bosses early in my career were ones where they drove
Speaker:me to be the opposite of them.
Speaker:So we didn't align in a lot of ways.
Speaker:So there was no one for me to go to the first person that I really could go to.
Speaker:Was you right?
Speaker:As we started to have those talks, I started to figure
Speaker:things out, but it was weird.
Speaker:I didn't think of it as.
Speaker:I am going to Bob for help.
Speaker:It's like we were just talking and as things happened we helped each
Speaker:other out and we were just talking.
Speaker:The, the second factor for me is that for like real personal trust where I'm going
Speaker:to be really vulnerable with someone that.
Speaker:Again, you've probably heard me talk about trust is the number
Speaker:one thing in an organization?
Speaker:Yes, but for me, there's this like second level of like personal trust
Speaker:that there's a really high bar.
Speaker:So there's a handful of people that are out there now that I
Speaker:would freely call and talk to.
Speaker:But I tend to keep that a relatively small group of folks just because.
Speaker:The mental hurdle that I have to get over with that person to feel comfortable with.
Speaker:It's pretty darn high.
Speaker:I think most people, I think that's normal.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I mean, maybe, maybe you're slightly higher than, but I
Speaker:think that's a normal thing.
Speaker:I have a very small group of trusted partners.
Speaker:I think I wrote another blog post around that at one Joanna Rothman
Speaker:inspired me once she talked about, I forget what she called them, but
Speaker:establishing and like your trusted circle or something like that.
Speaker:And, and sh, and when I read her article, it made me think about who is my cause.
Speaker:I don't always think about those people intentionally.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:I know that, you know, if I think about it, I know they're there.
Speaker:You're one of those, but I don't, I don't.
Speaker:You know, put that in my head.
Speaker:But I thought about that.
Speaker:And then it was a very small Ralph casaba is one of those people that, you
Speaker:know, historically I would go to a Mary Thorne one, it's a very small group.
Speaker:But it's, it's duration.
Speaker:It's, it's just guaranteed trust.
Speaker:I would trust you guys with anything.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I think for me, the thing that big trust hurdle is.
Speaker:Can I talk to this person about the situation and they're able to disconnect
Speaker:from whatever is happening in their life.
Speaker:And like, give me a real honest, thoughtful response
Speaker:that has intentions, right?
Speaker:Not, they aren't just saying words, but they're thoughtful about it and
Speaker:say, yeah, Here's how I would do it, or here's what I've been through and
Speaker:it's not like there's no agenda there.
Speaker:It's just like, yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm here to help.
Speaker:And maybe they say, gosh, I don't know, you know, things like that
Speaker:and being comfortable with that.
Speaker:So those are the things that kind of trip me into that world was like, okay, cool.
Speaker:Like you're now in the circle or whatever we want to call.
Speaker:It's the relationship as you were talking.
Speaker:What I thought of is it's not duration.
Speaker:It's not 10 years, five years, 10 20.
Speaker:It doesn't, it's not that, but it's have you had enough time where you've
Speaker:established a relationship right.
Speaker:With that person so that you just have a, to me it's you have a
Speaker:relationship and you've worked through some easy times and hard times.
Speaker:Exactly, exactly.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So like, I know.
Speaker:That you will disagree with me.
Speaker:If you think I'm going down the wrong path and everybody else that's in that
Speaker:circle, we have disagreed and we've talked through why and we understood, and it
Speaker:was disagree and commit and we support each other and all of those things.
Speaker:So again, it was that I never expect an agenda to be there or
Speaker:like, Hey, look, I'm just going to say nice things like no, Josh.
Speaker:I really think you need to hear this because you're filming at this pretty
Speaker:terribly, you know, I'm resonating with like going back to radical care.
Speaker:And Kim Scott talks about there's what the care personally axis.
Speaker:And, and then what is it is it give a damn or it's care personally and, you
Speaker:know, invest or something like that.
Speaker:But I I'm thinking about the care personally, part of relationship,
Speaker:part of me, you know, I care.
Speaker:So if I care about.
Speaker:I will be no nonsense with you.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:I will give you this.
Speaker:It's not that you have to agree with me, but I will be a straight shooter with you.
Speaker:The reason I can get away with that or whatever is you realize I have no agenda.
Speaker:Right, right.
Speaker:I just care about you.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:We have a relationship.
Speaker:So if I'm saying something it's not to judge you or to hurt you
Speaker:or to anything it's to help.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And I think back to corn, it sort of captures that.
Speaker:Cool.
Speaker:We've been in the business long enough that we've built relationships with a
Speaker:handful of people that we can trust.
Speaker:Yep.
Speaker:Let's say let's rewind the clock to, you know, 1520 for you 70 years ago, where
Speaker:you're just getting into the business where I was, I had like 40 years of
Speaker:experience at that point, but yeah.
Speaker:And, and so you you're, you're at a new job.
Speaker:And you're stumbling and fumbling, maybe the onboarding wasn't smooth.
Speaker:There's still like, it doesn't feel like you don't, you're stuck against something.
Speaker:You don't know how to get it done.
Speaker:How do you find that person that you can trust?
Speaker:you know, what do you do there?
Speaker:I mean, I, I was, I was at a contact and.
Speaker:I'll try to tell the story.
Speaker:Maybe, maybe this will help.
Speaker:Is that going to be an answer?
Speaker:But there was a guy, there was an agile coach that I knew.
Speaker:And I want you to sort of react to this.
Speaker:There might be some nuance here and there might not be right, but
Speaker:there's this agile coach and he and I were having coffee occasionally.
Speaker:And I'm blanking on his name.
Speaker:He moved to New York maybe a decade ago.
Speaker:But, and he was trying to build a consulting practice.
Speaker:And he had just gone independent.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And, and he was, and he offered to do coaching and icon.
Speaker:And eye contact.
Speaker:If you, you know, is my, like my pet organ, it was my
Speaker:experimental pet organization.
Speaker:My dude.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:He was like, yeah, good.
Speaker:So it was my place.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So for me and I was the head coach, right.
Speaker:I was not ego-driven head coach, but I'm right.
Speaker:This is my place.
Speaker:And he offered to do coaching and my initial response, not to him in my head.
Speaker:Was, you know, nice idea, but you're, you know, get the hell outta here.
Speaker:This is my place.
Speaker:This has, this had palms hangout.
Speaker:I'm the head coach here.
Speaker:And as I'm apt to do, I often reflect, we've talked about that.
Speaker:I'm a reflection maniac.
Speaker:So I reflected I'm like, why did I do.
Speaker:And I eventually invited him in and it was sort of pro bono,
Speaker:not sort of, it was pro bono.
Speaker:So the what's in it for him was he wanted to practice his
Speaker:assessment, his chops, right.
Speaker:And to give us, he gave us feedback and what was in it
Speaker:for me was some free insights.
Speaker:But it, I, this sticks out in my head because it was real one.
Speaker:It was hard for me to invite someone in.
Speaker:Too.
Speaker:It was really hard.
Speaker:I mean, not everything was, was perfect in Pottsville.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And he had feedback and it was really hard for me.
Speaker:It was a good exercise for me to hear it.
Speaker:And it was, and it, and I've done this before and I've done
Speaker:it since then, but it was, it was great to get another set of eyes.
Speaker:It was absolutely wonderful to get another set of eyes.
Speaker:So what am I trying to say?
Speaker:I think.
Speaker:There was hurdles, whether it's new job, old job, your job, your current,
Speaker:you've been there a few years, whatever.
Speaker:I think there's, I think there's hurdles of perception.
Speaker:I think there's hurdles of ego.
Speaker:There's hurdles of it's my place, like there's centralist nature and
Speaker:stuff, but I really have tried to fight through that because I think
Speaker:another set of eyes, respectful eyes.
Speaker:Right, right.
Speaker:Not ever, you know, you don't want to invite in the boy Scouts
Speaker:to, to look at your company.
Speaker:It's, I think it's a growth opportunity.
Speaker:I think it's wonderful, but I th I think a lot of people know.
Speaker:Like my perception is the majority of folks don't do it.
Speaker:They don't even like, like bringing me in.
Speaker:Why does someone wait till the very last minute when the shit is
Speaker:hitting the fan, because it was uncomfortable to ask for help early on.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:There's all these dynamics.
Speaker:So react to that story.
Speaker:Does any of that resonate?
Speaker:I agree.
Speaker:A similar scenario happened at Teradata after you left,
Speaker:so, oh, I remember you did.
Speaker:Brought in someone then.
Speaker:Yeah, we, we, we did some really cool stuff there and we did things that people
Speaker:across the organization couldn't get done.
Speaker:And because of our success, they asked me to go basically like
Speaker:on this agile roadshow where I went through all the offices in.
Speaker:China LA I like, I went to San Diego, right.
Speaker:All of their offices, like, Hey, you did this in the framework of data.
Speaker:Like, how did you do that?
Speaker:Because we want to do that.
Speaker:So I just went around and did that.
Speaker:And we had an office in Canada where there were people that were on my team and.
Speaker:They wanted to hire an external agile coach for Canada.
Speaker:I'm like WTF.
Speaker:Like, I, I got this, like, you know, what are you doing?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And, and that was ego-driven for sure.
Speaker:Also I had a terrible case of never saying no, get back in the day.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:It early in my career.
Speaker:Piled everything on, on top of me and felt the responsibility to do it.
Speaker:It helped me grow my career, but it also made life really difficult and made
Speaker:home life difficult at times and stuff like that, where I was so focused on, on
Speaker:work, that it would create some problems.
Speaker:And that's a thing that I had to learn and let's see the very next job after Teradata
Speaker:was no, the second job after that.
Speaker:The first time I ever told my boss, no, I can't do that.
Speaker:I can't take that on if I do, I'm going to not do well enough here.
Speaker:And that, that was a huge moment for me.
Speaker:That changed my, my course where I got comfortable enough, not having to
Speaker:pretend that I could do everything.
Speaker:I think, I think that's part of it as well, or no, everything.
Speaker:There's this and it's, and in all fairness, You know, I
Speaker:think it's harder for leaders.
Speaker:It's hard everywhere, but it's hard for leaders because you get paid more.
Speaker:Yeah, so there's an ego part to it, but there's also like when you've been a
Speaker:director of a software team, people are paying you to not have all the answers.
Speaker:I mean, maybe this is my perception of it.
Speaker:Maybe not yours, but I have a perception that folks are expecting
Speaker:me to, you know, my, the board is expecting me to know everything.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:My director, the C-level is expecting me to know everything and it's really hard.
Speaker:To say, no, I don't know everything.
Speaker:and part of that is maybe more me driven than it is them driven.
Speaker:Although there is there's two sides to it.
Speaker:And I think it's like, there's a lot of fear and maybe safety, psychological
Speaker:safety and fear comes into play.
Speaker:So it's not just an ego play.
Speaker:It's a, it's a, you know, I'm not doing my job.
Speaker:If I get someone else to do it, I found there are two groups of leaders that.
Speaker:One, once you to know everything about that function, if you're the director of
Speaker:X, you need to know everything about X and everything that's happening with X.
Speaker:And if you don't, you're a failure.
Speaker:I had leaders like that early in my career Gonzalo was that same way.
Speaker:Yep.
Speaker:Other bosses I've had long the same way I've been that I've
Speaker:been migrating to leadership.
Speaker:That value.
Speaker:What I see the, the role and responsibility that I have is to build
Speaker:a scalable, sustainable organization where I don't know everything.
Speaker:And I hire people that are smarter than me that I can trust and count on.
Speaker:That will live beyond me.
Speaker:Yep.
Speaker:That's how I've migrated my career because that's what I like to do.
Speaker:That's what I believe is best long-term as opposed to the short-term fix.
Speaker:So I've worked really hard to find.
Speaker:Leaders that aligned with me on that.
Speaker:And that's how I've shaped where I go.
Speaker:I think it's what was I going to say?
Speaker:I got diverted there a little bit.
Speaker:so I, one thing I want to say is the world of 2021 is vastly different.
Speaker:The accessibility to coaches and leaders and content.
Speaker:Versus when you, when you started, certainly like carrying around those stone
Speaker:tablets with different cranes, right?
Speaker:Everyone, it was telegraphs and trainings and things right there.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I mean, that was after 50 years of working for you, but like the stone tablets where.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:age chops here.
Speaker:They like heavy.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:You've been trying, it's been a while, so I feel I've got a pent up.
Speaker:It is.
Speaker:What's your point though?
Speaker:Is it is different today?
Speaker:Is that making it easier, more accessible?
Speaker:Less?
Speaker:I think today it makes it more accessible.
Speaker:You are listening to two liters.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:In the agile world.
Speaker:Offering free information that you can listen to anywhere.
Speaker:You can listen to it on your train ride.
Speaker:You can listen to it on an airplane.
Speaker:You can listen to it wherever while, while you're making dinner, then
Speaker:you factor in the world of discord.
Speaker:This is not a plug, but just the reality of there's these
Speaker:communities that are out there.
Speaker:Ours is on discord where like, you can go ask questions and like
Speaker:we're there and they're responding.
Speaker:And there's other thoughtful leaders that are there that are like,
Speaker:For somebody to ask a question cause they just want to help.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And then you look across the internet with that and it's everywhere.
Speaker:Now the other, the other side is sometimes you get air quote advice from people
Speaker:that intend well, but maybe mislead you.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:The quality.
Speaker:I mean the diversity of the advice.
Speaker:So, so the good news is it's a wide community.
Speaker:The bad news is it's a white community.
Speaker:And so it goes back to your trusted voices.
Speaker:The agile community is like that now.
Speaker:I mean, I think there's, I think there's an activity to pair down the voices.
Speaker:So find your voices, find your mentors, find your communities, pair them down
Speaker:to the trust, whatever your bar is like we were talking about, I'm doing
Speaker:the Josh thing and I'm like, right.
Speaker:So raise the bar and find that community.
Speaker:But then once you do that, then the flip side is then B start grooming yourself or.
Speaker:Changing yourself to become comfortable with that advice, right?
Speaker:To not be full of yourself, to run the expert, to run an experiment
Speaker:that someone else suggested to run an experiment when every ounce of
Speaker:your being says that won't work.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:It's tid it just to run the experiment or the trial, you know,
Speaker:you and I are living proof of that.
Speaker:One of the things I always come back to is when you told me to
Speaker:get out of the wreck, I like Bob.
Speaker:No.
Speaker:And you were like, just do it, just try it.
Speaker:And I came back like a month later, I'm like, dang it, Bobby.
Speaker:We're right.
Speaker:You know, but, but I had to be, I disagreed with you completely,
Speaker:but I'm like, well, this is, this is a person that I trusted.
Speaker:If he says, let's try.
Speaker:Cool.
Speaker:Let's try and see what happens.
Speaker:Part of that.
Speaker:That's a tactical thing.
Speaker:Strict as TJ things really get the advice.
Speaker:Really put yourself.
Speaker:I do think there's an ego aspect to it.
Speaker:I do think there's a control aspect to it.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:I am a leader.
Speaker:I'm, there's a command and control aspect to it.
Speaker:So really putting that stuff.
Speaker:I wonder what can drive you through that?
Speaker:So I'm thinking, I think we've talked in here.
Speaker:About putting the needs of the team above our needs, our personal needs.
Speaker:You've talked about that.
Speaker:And I've talked about that.
Speaker:I wonder if that helps like the needs of the many outweigh
Speaker:the needs of the one, right.
Speaker:From a leadership perspective.
Speaker:I think that's one of my driving forces.
Speaker:Like why did I invite that coach in.
Speaker:I just wanted to get better.
Speaker:And I w and I wanted, I wanted further insights from my team.
Speaker:It wasn't actually about me.
Speaker:It was about my organization.
Speaker:And can I get something that I'm not seeing?
Speaker:I'm not I have blind spots.
Speaker:So how do I get that?
Speaker:So one of the drivers there is breaking through that as saying.
Speaker:If it's just all about me, I'm going to miss those things.
Speaker:So I have to make it about the organization.
Speaker:That may be some way of motive, you know, sort of in sending yourself through that.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:It, it, it took me, let's see, 15 years to figure that out.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And like I'm a stubborn guy.
Speaker:There's zero doubt that none of the better me, because I'm super.
Speaker:And one of the things that, that really frustrated me w when you and I first met,
Speaker:and I'm sure it drove you crazy because you're like this young whipper snapper,
Speaker:just like, you don't know what you're talking about, what I would get so mad
Speaker:that experience carried so much weight.
Speaker:And I felt like I'm better than that person, but they have
Speaker:15 more years of experience.
Speaker:So they're just going to get that.
Speaker:Because they've been doing it for longer, but I really believe I'm better.
Speaker:And like, I don't even get a chance to prove it.
Speaker:So that, that, that was one of those things that kind of drove me crazy.
Speaker:Now, as you go, when you age and mature and like you become the one
Speaker:that is experienced and then you start growing and building teams and you
Speaker:see that chasm between the experience and the ones that aren't there yet.
Speaker:Now I understand, like, man, I was an idiot.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:13 years ago, when you and I started talking through this stuff, I'm
Speaker:like, I am super thankful that you didn't just like, dude, you're crazy.
Speaker:Go away, you know?
Speaker:And, and actually put up with me whining and complaining about that stuff.
Speaker:It's everyone.
Speaker:And not everyone does it, but it's that switch of, you know, the value proposition
Speaker:for leadership is not the leader.
Speaker:It's the organizations that you can co-create right.
Speaker:It's it's not about you.
Speaker:It's making that switch of me.
Speaker:To them.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And actually not what I do, but what I co-create.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:It's, it's that value it's like, the less you do is, is, you know,
Speaker:if the organization is picking up, then you've done your job, but it
Speaker:it's, it's that juxtaposition that, that shift that you have to make.
Speaker:And it's incredible.
Speaker:And, and very many people don't make that shift of it's about the organization.
Speaker:Like I get value by growing.
Speaker:You said it.
Speaker:What I do is I can scale organizations and you can literally walk away
Speaker:and that organization will be fine.
Speaker:Now that's not your goal.
Speaker:Your goal was to build that organization which isn't solely dependent on you.
Speaker:So maybe that's another, that's that central, that's a central part of what
Speaker:we're talking about is if, once you make that pivot, then it's so much
Speaker:easier to find other voices or ask for help, external help, internal help.
Speaker:It doesn't matter.
Speaker:welcome to our diversity and inclusion.
Speaker:Bob has some excited.
Speaker:This is like a celebration version of diversity and inclusion,
Speaker:and it's very cool stuff is going on out in the community.
Speaker:So one thing that a casters is there is a webinar, a panel discussion
Speaker:coming up on October 30th.
Speaker:The link will be below it's a Saturday from 10 to 11 Eastern time.
Speaker:And it's the journey, the titles of the journey of seven
Speaker:black scrum Alliance coaches.
Speaker:Now the good news is there are seven blacks from liar.
Speaker:The bad news is I think there's only seven and we're going to get it.
Speaker:We're going to need a bigger sets part of this.
Speaker:So and I know a few of them, Brandon rains is a coach in the DC area.
Speaker:Wonderful coach and just, just incredible Angie paid.
Speaker:I know she's in the Dallas area.
Speaker:Kemi Raji is in the coach in the Toronto area.
Speaker:Femme Femi ODA, Lucy.
Speaker:Is in UK and London.
Speaker:I think a coach there, a lot of them I've had in my calc class and
Speaker:I've met them over, over time as part of, as part of our diverse,
Speaker:my diversity efforts, our diversity efforts, but th the PAs to resist OLS.
Speaker:Oh, wow.
Speaker:Did that hurt?
Speaker:Oh, it did.
Speaker:And I didn't get it out quite as nicely as I thought, but it's a new Gopal.
Speaker:So I met a new.
Speaker:And she's a coach in the Dallas area.
Speaker:she is a CEC certified enterprise coach.
Speaker:She just, so not only is she participating in this panel, but she just dumped it.
Speaker:And, got Bo she got elected to the scrum Alliance board of directors.
Speaker:She is the first woman black woman that has gotten elected to the board.
Speaker:And that just happened a week or two ago.
Speaker:And I am just, I'm blown away by her.
Speaker:and she got turned down the last time.
Speaker:So resilience, perseverance, you know, and she's just, she is wonderful,
Speaker:you know, that group Josh in Nigeria, but I've talked about the support.
Speaker:The girls I knew is central to that.
Speaker:She's, she's a founder of that group.
Speaker:I don't know what she's got children.
Speaker:She's got a job and she gives back to the community.
Speaker:So everyone, I just around of medic Castilian applause
Speaker:for that, it's a wonderful.
Speaker:please try to attend.
Speaker:If you do attend, celebrate these folks, inspire these folks.
Speaker:We need more folks.
Speaker:We need more diversity in our, in our agile.
Speaker:And, and the one request that we have is share this, share this across your
Speaker:network, so that some of your connections that might be inspired by this webinar.
Speaker:This person becoming the director or a part of the board of
Speaker:directors that can inspire people.
Speaker:So do the simple thing of sharing this info out and help
Speaker:grow the community by that.
Speaker:This is probably the simplest ask that we've ever had of you in this realm.
Speaker:Just, just share, just spread it out there.
Speaker:Wouldn't it be cool.
Speaker:Medic casters.
Speaker:If we overwhelmed the scrum Alliance and they run out of
Speaker:spots, how cool would that be?
Speaker:That kind of interest.
Speaker:All right.
Speaker:Back to the episode, we basically want to denial of service attack there and
Speaker:have it all just be medic cast listeners.
Speaker:How cool would that be?
Speaker:I'm going to say like a countdown timer.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:See if we can do that.
Speaker:And I'm with you.
Speaker:Count on you, everyone out there.
Speaker:We're count on you.
Speaker:All right.
Speaker:Let's get back to the episode.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:Anything else on this subject?
Speaker:Yeah, we we've, we've talked about, I've talked about my crash course.
Speaker:I do a teams where they.
Speaker:Debugging teams together and then crucial conversations together.
Speaker:And like, that's a, that's a requirement.
Speaker:I am trying to fast-track that trust and to create the safe communication that
Speaker:has to happen for people to find their mentors and to find people that they trust
Speaker:and to understand that they are a team.
Speaker:So there are things like that that you can do with leaders across the organization.
Speaker:I've worked at places where.
Speaker:The CEO ran the leadership group through stuff like that as well.
Speaker:Again, trying to fast track it.
Speaker:It happens a lot when there's an acquisition and there's new people
Speaker:and new leaders and all that stuff.
Speaker:So if you wait for it to happen, it might not.
Speaker:You have to there's there's a young lady I called.
Speaker:And I met her in a few years ago, maybe three years ago, we did an, an
Speaker:agile coach camp in Raleigh at red hat.
Speaker:And her name is dimple Shaw and dimple signed up she's in Ohio or something, but
Speaker:we won't hold that against her, but she's in the Midwest and she flew down here.
Speaker:And my daughter and I were, so Rhiannon came down and attended the camp with
Speaker:me and we were doing some of those open space, breakout things and I'm and Rianna.
Speaker:And I were co leading one and we met in bull and depo resonated
Speaker:with some of the things that was self care topics, as I recall.
Speaker:And and then she went back home and she reached out to him.
Speaker:Maybe six months later or something.
Speaker:And she was looking for a coach and I do some pro bono coaching
Speaker:with a particular residents towards women or people of color.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So I'll pro bono coach, a lot of people, but I try to help those.
Speaker:I try to be diverse.
Speaker:And so I signed up and I've been coaching dimple since then.
Speaker:So I've been off and on coaching her for a few years and she was.
Speaker:She was talking to the day and she was saying something about, you
Speaker:know, my coaches, Bob Galen, and some people know me and things like that.
Speaker:And it's like, oh my God, you know, Bob is your coach to, to the one person
Speaker:who knows who I am and, and she, and she was like, yeah, it's like, how
Speaker:did that, how did it make that happen?
Speaker:And she's like, I asked, yep.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:She's like, I asked what else I asked.
Speaker:And he said, yeah, And we've been doing that Evers ever since.
Speaker:And I think there's value in it.
Speaker:The point of that story is I don't think people ask enough.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And that's what we're it's they really, they don't ask.
Speaker:They don't ask internally.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:They don't ask externally you, they don't ask and it's like, so shame on you.
Speaker:Like, we need, you need that voice in order to develop.
Speaker:You need help.
Speaker:You can't do it by yourself.
Speaker:And so be proactive and be prepared to be surprised.
Speaker:Yeah, right by people's receptiveness, I think in general, I mean, not
Speaker:everyone's an ogre out there.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I agreed.
Speaker:And I'll say no to someone.
Speaker:I mean, I'm not infinitely capacity, but one of my, I don't have a lot.
Speaker:I mean, I, I do this, this is something I want to do to the
Speaker:community and I don't get as many, I don't get that many requests.
Speaker:Agreed, agreed.
Speaker:I've I've had in the past six months to a year.
Speaker:A handful of people reach out and I responded to every one
Speaker:because you can tell and their request that it's important.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:They care and they want to get better.
Speaker:And one of my favorites is a woman in Russia who reached out.
Speaker:She was getting ready to start her own practice and just wanted to talk to me.
Speaker:She was surprised that I responded.
Speaker:And then when we got on zoom, She was like freaking out because like, I can't
Speaker:believe like it's just you and me on zoom.
Speaker:Like I never thought this was of like, it.
Speaker:It's just me.
Speaker:I'm just Josh.
Speaker:And I'm here to help.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:And we've stayed in touch and she's doing amazing.
Speaker:And I played a teeny tiny part in her doing that.
Speaker:Like that was mostly her.
Speaker:Like, she's the one that made it happen, but I think you and I, and especially
Speaker:anyone out there that creates content, it's clear, we're trying to help.
Speaker:We are trying to help in as many ways as we can by, you know, spending a Sunday
Speaker:morning at Bob's house in beautiful downtown Carrie recording, a podcast.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:You know, so like it's clear, there are people that are out.
Speaker:Just ask, just ask and, and that's, that sounds simple,
Speaker:everyone, but there's not a lot.
Speaker:There's not enough asking there really isn't and, and we're making it
Speaker:I had a young lady reach out to me.
Speaker:I try to about a discount.
Speaker:So I have these diversity discounts for count classes and I don't get enough.
Speaker:I'm like, I don't even know how to.
Speaker:Like we talk about it in the ma in the Medicare list.
Speaker:And I wish people were, I wish I had the problem that where people were
Speaker:beating, like they were beating on my door and I had to cut off the discounts.
Speaker:Cause I wasn't making enough money.
Speaker:I wish I had that problem.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And it's just, you know, so there's asking, but not enough.
Speaker:Now, one of the cool thing she did is she did a LinkedIn post to her.
Speaker:Like I Latina.
Speaker:Community.
Speaker:And she's like, oh, there's this guy.
Speaker:And he doesn't, I'm like, yeah, she asked me first shit, I can, I, can I do
Speaker:something on LinkedIn to my community?
Speaker:I'm like, of course you can.
Speaker:I'd love that.
Speaker:I want to make this available, but there's not enough asking in the world.
Speaker:And I think this, this podcast is focused on trying to break that
Speaker:barrier down of whatever it is for you personally, to sit down and
Speaker:figure out you so make the assumption.
Speaker:It's just like self-awareness, you're not self-aware.
Speaker:So you are not asking for help enough that you say that embrace that medic
Speaker:casters, embrace that in your role.
Speaker:So then the question is, and don't get, you know, offended or
Speaker:defensive that, but, but you are not.
Speaker:You're not getting enough help and you need help in order to grow.
Speaker:Here's the key, very few people are.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So you're not alone.
Speaker:You're not unique.
Speaker:You're like everybody else you're like me and Bob right away.
Speaker:We're always talking back and forth.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So go and ask, go get help.
Speaker:Internally.
Speaker:Find a mentor.
Speaker:Be bold.
Speaker:Be courageous.
Speaker:Don't the first, no that you get it's just to know someone might
Speaker:be too busy to go to someone else.
Speaker:Like we were talking about.
Speaker:Trust BARR.
Speaker:So there now there are billions of voices out there, like just like there's
Speaker:billions of agile coaches in the world.
Speaker:So there's billions of them.
Speaker:So come up with a filters, be selective, but be courageous and, and find those
Speaker:people and reach out and get help.
Speaker:And don't get full of yourself.
Speaker:You, we all can grow.
Speaker:Josh, even though we do the Medi-Cal, we've been doing it for
Speaker:12, 10 years, 11 years, 12 years.
Speaker:We have, I have what I'm coming up on 40 years of experience 40, there
Speaker:were cars when I started working.
Speaker:you have 25 years of experience.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:There may not have been cars, whatever, but we have, but we're
Speaker:still, we're still mentoring.
Speaker:We're still being mentored.
Speaker:We're still asking for help.
Speaker:We're not, we need help.
Speaker:We, we, you know, we can learn.
Speaker:And so having that continuous learning mindset as well,
Speaker:continue with growth, continuous learning is a, is a good mindset.
Speaker:I agree.
Speaker:Did we, did we cover this?
Speaker:I think the fork has been stuck the fork.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So medic casters, a call to action.
Speaker:What are you going to do?
Speaker:And, and us, but not just us.
Speaker:What are you going to do?
Speaker:So we want to hear some stories about people who reached out
Speaker:and looked for help and got it.
Speaker:And it's, it's create a snowball of momentum around on what's that what's
Speaker:that place where this cord discord yes.
Speaker:Link below.
Speaker:I am so late.
Speaker:I just, I know it, the best part everybody is that Bob is so confused by it.
Speaker:He has two accounts.
Speaker:Do I have to, and I don't know.
Speaker:I wouldn't know how to, I wouldn't even know how to log in.
Speaker:I really like, I've tried to mention you twice and, or like a couple
Speaker:of times it's like, well, there's two bobs, which, which Bob is it.
Speaker:And Bob doesn't even know which problem it is.
Speaker:So everyone share your stories and let us know what's going on out there.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:So from beautiful downtown Cary, North Carolina, I'm Bob Galen, and I'm Josh
